"But I'll learn to get by on little victories"

So, I haven't written all summer....and now, I only have a few hours left of mine. I start my senior year at College of Charleston tomorrow morning. Its scary as crap. Now that I think about it its kind of interesting. My first class of college was a tuesday morning at 9:25 (psychology 101) and now I'm beginning this last year the same way... except this time its Modern British Lit....a class I have been waiting to take for seriously ever. I am pretty excited about the classes I am taking this semester, but at the same time it seems seriously odd that I am in fact going back. For some reason, after this summer I feel very distanced from school. It almost feels like I have already shed that portion of my life. I don't know why. I guess its just all that has happened, along with the fact that I have become a great deal more independent. Then again, I did kind of feel like this when I went back to school last semester. I think I commented on that feeling.

So, how am I getting ready to begin the new school year? I'm listening to Matt Nathanson radio (amaaaazing....its on his site), putting off cleaning and getting ready for tomorrow. I was watching Wizards of Waverly Place online (thats right, I'm so lame I've gone looking for Disney shows! Oh well, its a short break from the heaviness of Bones), but now I'm back to Mr. Nathanson. I really wish my fiancé was here to calm me down and force me to be productive, but he won't be off work until midnight. I'll get to see him and then go immediately to sleep....though class tomorrow isn't nearly as early as when I have to open the store....so maybe I will stay up.

I'll have to decide sometime soon what I want to do with my life. I have been thinking about becoming a librarian, but I'm not so sure. I am really loving this idea of watching television and film and writing stuff about it....I don't really mean in the strictly critical way either.....I mean in the full on research applying, meta-whatnot way. I really need to just hone my process and work on actually getting words on the page. I have soooo many thoughts that run through my head all day that I want write down, but I never get around to actually focussing those thoughts into a thesis oriented paper of sorts....or even a novel. I have been working on bits of creative writing my whole life and I haven't gotten any of them really finished....This goes along with my focus. I'm going to be studying a great deal of the contemporary and abstract this semester and hopefully that will help me orient everything. I would love to write a novel in some sort of an experimental form....the marriage of the visual and the textual is amazing... It just requires work....and confidence....That could be my problem....and prob is....I'm not confident that everyone is going to get it/like it/ what not, so I shy away and then I end up so shied away that its not even what I believe in anymore...and therefore it doesn't get to stay....Bah....

I need to stop rambling and actually do something.... I pledge to attempt to be a better student and a more organized student this last year....I pledge to actually start working on things so that I can write my papers to their full potential and not let them shy away to Bs....I pledge to work my thoughts through fully and not let them simmer, even if they will get me an A as is...I pledge to stop just trying to BE and try to actually be what I want. By the time I get married (this time next year ish) I want to have a Novel under way (actually under way and GROWING) and to have seen Mr. Nathanson in concert at least once more....He's so my favorite and seeing him live the other night just proved that to myself even more. I feel for some reason that I have as of late really been figuring out what I'm made of and what drives me...and I really interested to see where that takes me....

Cheers

(the title reference Btw)

So yeah, I kind of lied last time. I've been working a whole lot and every time I went to actually say something, my mind was far too muddled to actually produce anything. Usually I just end up surfing the internet aimlessly and/or watching an episode of Buffy The Vampire Slayer. If you are curious, I've been watching it for various reasons. First of all, it has various actors that I like (David Boreanaz and Alyson Hannigan). Secondly, its just such a pop culture reference that cannot be ignored. I started to notice this when my literacy professor mentioned the work done about how literacy is portrayed in the show and all. Ever since, the show seems to be everywhere...So I'm educating myself. I'm not too far, but I'm beginning to like it more than I did in the beginning.

Two or more hours after writing that first paragraph.....I have finished season one...and I have to say that the last three episodes (especially the last one) really redeemed the show for me...Anyway, I must go pack/perhaps watch more. Moving into the new house the next two days...

Haven't written in a while STOP will write tomorrow STOP Lots to catch up on STOP

We Sing, We Dance, We Steal Things

Why did it take me so long to get this CD? I Love Mraz and I love this CD even upon first listen...I just had to say that and felt as though I had already updated my twitter too many times today. Well, let me get back to studying...now that I've gotten a frapp. to replenish my energy after a whole day of NOT studying Chaucer.

all time fav artists for sitting back and loving life
-Matt Nathanson
-Jason Mraz
-Ingrid Michaelson


-Cheers!

Stuck?

Excited!!!

Okay, so I'm finishing up with exams and all, which is weird because I only just recently finally felt as though I was in school and not just going to class in between work and social activities. It was weird....but anyway, I'm almost done and I'm upset because while I was about to die from a work overload, I also was still very productive and I liked the feeling...but now that things have finally slowed done I'm like Blah...All I want to do is sit home and watch/research shows. I mean, I want my job to be somehow oriented around either the big screen, small screen, or at least just the printed page, so its good in a way that I am immersing myself as such. At the same time though, for some reason, I get so tired from working the lil bit that I am, that all I want to do is sit and somehow do nothing. I'm sure that once I get into the swing of summer it'll all be okay, I just feel as though I have all these ideas, whether they be with artistic things or books I want to read or whatever, that I can never seem to actually force myself to choose which thing to do. Right now, for example, I'm writing this as a sort of procrastination for reading my book (Break No Bones by Kathy Reichs -takes place here in Charleston), which in turn is a procrastination for going to sleep, something I really should do so I can get up early and have breakfast with my fiancé and his family before his mom drives back up to VA....bah! Something save me from the unending loop! Hopefully either getting my higher position at work or moving will knock me out of it.....le sigh :) Anyway, I'm out!

-cheers

BTW, Wolverine-enjoyable, but I wish for a revision/addition of depth/darkness to the story line. Perhaps I was just in a bad mood. I did have a horrible headache and it was late since it was the midnight showing...maybe that just distanced me from it all.

Oh, to procrastinate...

So, I should be studying for my exam on Literature for Adolescents (Eng 320) that's tomorrow at noon. However, I have been extremely bad at actually sitting down and focussing on the material.  It's difficult since the class is discussion based and goes off on so many tangents that the actual material is kind of hard for my to grasp.  I don't mean thats its hard to understand.  I find it very interesting and enjoy the class a lot, I'm just slightly a little lost at what to study....and due to my hell week last week, I haven't done a lot of the later readings....Oh well, this isn't a blog meant to rant on my exam.  Its actually meant to highlight what I have been doing now that I'm not about to die.

btw, before I go on, please keep my friend Kayla in your prayers, she's having heart problems and I care for her deeply and want to be healthy again.

Anyway, as previously stated.  I've been doing everything but be productive....depending on your personal definition of the term.  The last unit in my American Film Studies course was on musicals...so I've been hoarding those from the library....I say hoarding....but so far I've only got two on top of the ones for class.   I have plenty more on my list though.  I have found out though the Fred Astaire is my Buster Keaton of this semester.  I absolutely love Buster Keaton and after last semester I got nearly his whole collection of works for Christmas.  I really need to get back on track with finishing it. Anyway, I've been watching a bunch of Astaire's things, reading up on him and so on.  I even ordered his autobiography from my work (Waldenbooks).  He seems like he was a very interesting man.  Just the fact that he has in his will that no one is allowed to make a movie version of his life seems very intriguing and honorable. He is stated in saying "It is there because I have no particular desire to have my life misinterpreted, which it would be." 

For the most part, however, I have been catching up on Bones.  I had had to cut the show from my schedule this last school year because I just got so busy with school work that I couldn't handle it all.  I have always loved the show, and adored the entire cast of characters though.  Anyway, so when I found out that Booth and Brennan were finally getting together (I'm sorry if thats a spoiler for anyone) I just had to catch up.  I started a lil before hell week, had that week, and then finished them over the last few days.  I had like almost 30 to watch I think...this past season is rather long comparative to what some seasons seem to be now.  I just finished this morning/last night at like 3am and am now ready to watch it as it airs for the next few weeks.  Perhaps I should ask for that day off of work haha.  Eh, if I do have to work I'll just watch it online, like I have been doing.  I'll be sad, but there's nothing that can really be done.  That week is rather busy with things I'm excited about btw.  GreenDay's new CD (21st Century Breakdown) is coming out then...and so is Lee Pace's film, Possession....(possession looks promising but, sadly due to the economy its distributor went out of business, has had to go straight to DVD) Yay!  Also yay for Wolverine this weekend and The Soloist.

I'm also super excited for the finale of How I Met Your Mother...So many things I've heard will be going on.  I really should just take a blog/day here and there to devote to just how I feel about where my favorite shows are going....I think I will...Look out for quite a few updates hopefully as these shows come to an end.  

The biggest and saddest of these for me of course will be Pushing Daisies.  I'm a part of the  ABC Inner Circle and so I've been privileged enough to have already seen two of the three unaired episodes (which will be airing starting may 30th).  Seeing how quick they've been showing them, I'm assuming the final one will be screened sometime next weekish.  I'm kind of sad because today when I watched it I felt distracted.  I had just bought some new vine charcoal and was sketching random things as I watched, as well as trying to chat with the other fans in the room....so I yeah....I'll probably have to go watch it on YouTube or what not before the final ep.  I hate to think it was disinterest that made me not focus. What I saw I liked.  There still seems like a lot to tie up...and I know that since they weren't given the chance to really end it properly, a lot of those plots will be left open...which sucks....The comic book is a go, which is good...though its going to be a good deal different, it seems, than the show...a lot less character driven perhaps? sad day....I know a lot of people want to see a movie to tie everything up....but I just don't know.  I'm really going to miss it...but after seeing the Dead Like Me movie, I'm kind of scared.  I know Brian Fuller didn't have anything to do with it (the aformentioned movie)...but it was just so disappointing in so many areas (some due to things they just couldn't help) that I wouldn't want that to happen to Pushing Daisies.  I hear the final episode is amazing.....so I'm really excited.  

Well, since all I'm doing is babbling about stuff, I should probably go and get some sleep so I can wake up and study at least an hour before the test.  Here's to the summer (which promises trips like disney and dallas, possible raises, and moving into a new house....fun times)!

I think Cheek to Cheek is just beautiful...and Drum Crazy really shows his individual talent. Next Time Maybe I'll highlight some Gene Kelley. From what I've seen I love Singing in the Rain as a whole....but only a few routines from An American in Paris....I'll keep you updated...

-Cheers

more to come

I am in the middle of drowning in schoolwork...but hopefully once summer comes I can get back to this and my various other hobbies. Until then, here's a few pics of my first attempts at wood-burning.

The first one was my very first attempt. Its based off of the very last line from Edith Wharton's novel, The House of Mirth. The last chapter of that book is pure beauty. I really should have used a different tip when trying to do the words, but hey, thats why to practice, to learn.

The second one there was my birthday gift to my fiancé. It was only my second wood-burning and I was actually very impressed my how far I progressed with it. At the moment I am working on a pair of stools inspired by Pushing Daisie's Ned and Chuck relationship. I'll prob post some pics of the first one next time...it won't be quite finished, but I'm thinking its going to be a slow work in progress. This last pic is just something I found while working on my Chaucer paper. Its from an old edition of a children's Canterbury Tales. I just love the idea of that sort of relationship between Chaucer and his readers, no matter how altered the children's versions were. Also, its just kind of cute.

Cheers!